Monday, May 23, 2016

Finding Presence in The Pulse of Life

Presence is not stillness. But presence can be found in the the vibration of stillness. Nothing is ever truly still.  When the body becomes still, there is a pulse that continues. Heartbeat. Breath. Vibration.


On a boat somewhere in Indonesia.
I've always found the strongest sense of presence with movement or rhythm. Yoga, running, in the ocean, on a boat in Indonesia, on an airplane, watching children play, the river. Often at unexpected circumstances. And in that moment when I feel totally present, its expansive. The perception of time slows down. My field of awareness grows encompassing all that I see around me, not just what is right in front of me. It is in these moments that I have felt the closest to one-ness, unity consciousness, bliss. 



A recent moment of true presence. 

Last week the kids at my daughters school had their end of the year music performances. The performance goes from youngest to oldest, kindergarten to 6th grade, in an auditorium full of peers, teachers and families. Its amazing to view it in this way. We see the progression, the maturation in a flash. Kindergarten class sings a song about butterflies, in sweet sweet voices, a little off key and disjointed, full of joy. The beauty is in the imperfection. Than 1st/2nd grade, you can see its a little more in-synch. Singing their best, loud and proud. Next, the 3rd/4th grade together. More refined and clear. Still at this age, uninhibited. Finally the 5th/6th grade classes organize themselves on the risers. 

The audience quiet. Belinda, the music teacher, always starts each song by saying, "music begins and ends in...?" and the kids chant together, "silence!"  So there is slight pause of utter silence, which holds the space, unifies all who are present in the room. Presence is powerful. And than this...

These young innocent voices began to sing, Blackbird by The Beatles:


Blackbird singing in the dead of night

Take these broken wings and learn to fly
All your life
You were only waiting for this moment to arise.

Blackbird singing in the dead of night

Take these sunken eyes and learn to see
All your life
You were only waiting for this moment to be free.

Blackbird fly Blackbird fly

Into the light of the dark black night.

Blackbird fly Blackbird fly

Into the light of the dark black night.

Blackbird singing in the dead of night

Take these broken wings and learn to fly
All your life
You were only waiting for this moment to arise
You were only waiting for this moment to arise
You were only waiting for this moment to arise.

My eyes welled up. It was just so beautiful. In that moment everything was perfectly aligned. The students singing with heart and soul, yet quite ordinary, as if its just another moment in time. The audience present and receptive. Proud teachers standing by, perhaps feeling full and content with all that is, as the year comes to a close. I could feel the entire room, all the way to the walls. I could feel what was held in this space, in this moment. 
It was a precious life moment. It was art. It was true presence. 

In a flash, that moment was gone. 
But the beat continues.